Polite online dating rejection

How to politely decline people on internet dating sites? May 2, 8: For a little background, I went through a tough divorce in and am finally ready to try dating. I am known for joking around a lot, making people laugh and complimenting them. I am realizing more and more how often this gets confused for flirting and has begun to lead to a lot of misunderstandings.

But I feel like a jerk when they say, "I remember you, I thought you were very charming, would you like to get a drink? Should I bite the bullet and just go on these dates anyway? I am not one to ignore emails or messages if someone is nice enough to contact me. But I am very sensitive to leading people on.

You are not the Infinite and Eternal One that she is hanging her hopes of romance and happiness on. If they persist, just ignore them. Being direct is not being a jerk. Like you, I was getting contacted by men I knew in my town. That was really weird.

So I ended up replying by saying thanks for the offer but I just met someone and want to see where it goes. Also, they have friends. You do not owe anyone a date. If they want an explanation, feel free to say "I would prefer not to", or simply not reply, as you prefer. And then do not communicate any further, even when prodded. Unless someone is being a jerk, or being aggressive, not responding just seems like the easy-for-me avoidance solution, not the polite solution.

Polite to me way to do it: I am sorry, but I am not interested right now. Either Ambient2 or edgeways notes are fine. No wondering if the person got your email, and no awkwardness. A quick response and onto the next person. I ignored it because he was so very much not my type physically that it would be an impossible gap to breach, many of his OKC answers were diametrically opposed to mine including the fact that he wanted kids and I do not, which is dealbreaker territory in your 30s ; besides, we did not actually know each other at all.

Ignoring his message felt similar to ignoring those gas station attendants that always ask you for your phone number when you just want to buy gas. A month or so later, I disabled my account because having an exceedingly busy life had utterly superseded any desire to date. A few days later, he found my email address we belong to a local email list that, hatefully, does not use blind carbon copy and sent me an message asking if he was the reason I disabled my OKC account.

At that point, I stopped attending the events I would see him at and never again returned. When I see him now, I avert my eyes. He did not have the courage to ever speak to me in person, ever: Thinking that disabling my OKC account had anything to do with him whatsoever: I should have just said no. Please do not just go on dates with these women. As a lady who is currently seeking a dude to date, and who is often the initiator in these sorts of situations, I can attest that we are mostly adults who can handle honest rejection so long as it is delivered quickly and with minimal fuss -- truly, it is OK!

In fact, I think dudes I like who reject me as a prospective partner right up front are pretty sweet for having the nerve to just rip the band-aid off, and I have gone on to be good friends with some of them as a result. The only way these women could possibly think poorly of you is if you are rude in declining their invitations, or if you agree to take them out on dates while already knowing you did not want to be involved with them in any way.

We will never be able to spare people from discomfort, even if we do everything they want us to do. And the person you would attempt to force yourself to date would notice how hollow your words and actions are, sooner or later. Take care, best of luck! I message people sometimes and forget about it pretty quickly no matter how much I liked their profile.

I would be really disappointed if I found out someone went on a date with me out of some sort of guilty feeling of obligation. Some even from interesting people but maybe not interesting enough to date. Thought it would be fun to write back just for the heck of it. Not very many women in our culture are forward enough to ask for the date themselves for better and for worse usually for worse.

Hope you find someone who is! The courage to ask is rare and deserves to be nurtured if only for the sake of the next guy who might appreciate the message. Obligations and expectations on first dates are for the birds. As others have mentioned, saying a clear, polite "No, but thank you. This gets you off the hook with the least amount of hurt feelings.

If you already know the person, maybe just That said, I think it would be weird to just ignore a message from someone you know and will be interacting with in the future. For those who have emailed you thus far, I would respond briefly with one of the excellent suggestions above. For the future, I would put a notation on my profile that says something like: Rejection sucks, and some people take it more to heart than others.

But there are folks out there who are alright with no response, too. There is really nothing you can do to control how people feel about being told "no. Take that with how ever many grains of salt you like; and C It likely will not stop anyone nor will it prevent someone from feeling some kind of way about it. By going on a dating website and posting a profile, you ARE soliciting people to contact you if they are interested. The nicest thing you can do is be nice back, even if it is simply a standard brush-off.

See what people are like and to test your initial judgements. Meeting someone for a coffee and an hour of chat is fine: And as you mention that in some cases you know these women already, it would seem bizarre to refuse to meet them for a coffee. Do not ignore people simply because you feel they are of no use to you. By taking the counsel of a depressing number of mefites above, you would be actively making the world a shabbier, more broken place to live in where people have value to one another only if they can be of use.

Do write back a polite, clear, firm response in either case, whether you decide to meet someone or not. Bling on a Budget!


Hey guys, So I'm very new to OkCupid and online dating after a ~5 year relationship, and I've been having a hard time figuring out how to kindly. Online Dating Dilemma: Dishing Out Rejection; Online Dating Dilemma: Dishing Out Rejection. Related Book. Online Dating For Dummies. By Judith Silverstein, Michael Lasky. If the first inquiry was polite, you have no reason to take out the big guns so early. Even if you donít want any further e-mails from that person, why slap him or her.

Total 1 comments.
#1 22.09.2018 –≤ 18:34 Skolkomozhnotakiskat:
Aftar kill yourself